Just when I thought things were going well with my significant other -- BOOM!-- a situation arose that all my buttons were on alert, and ready to fire! A trust issue: he has been caught in a lie in the recent past. Enabling an alcoholic family member financially. A very ugly situation when I accidentally found out. He had no intention of telling me. The lie had been continuing for 4 years! And another scene of the same situation has reared its ugly head, and he is faced with another decision. Will he tell me the truth in how he handles it? I do not know. I have not forgotten nor forgiven him for his repeated lie. I have just tried to accept that it took place. But now, will it take place again? And how will I handle it if he lies to me again, and I find out? Will my Borderline fast train to self-destruction derail?
I hate this. I hate all of this doubt. I will never fully trust this man again. I have been with him for over six years. He enables and lies to avoid confrontation. I am sick of his behavior. He never seems to "get it." He just doesn't seem to care, and makes up all sorts of excuses and reasons. And he says he is in recovery. What recovery? My head is mis-firing all over the place. This sucks.
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