About Me

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Midwest, United States
I am a first-born female over age 60. I am middle class, and have a graduate degree in Business. I have over 28 continuous years in recovery from alcoholism. I have been in Borderline treatment for over 14 years. I still have not reached full-time Serenity, but I have continued to survive this disorder using distress tolerance skills, interpersonal effectiveness, mindfulness, and emotion regulation. These are the 4 components of the DBT Skills as devised by Dr. Marsha Linehan. Email me with any questions at amy@alawebpages.com. Many thanks and blessings for sharing my interest and broadening your awareness of this disorder.

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Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Sluggish and Nervous

Hello. It is sunny here today, and very warm. I try to catch the last few rays of summer sun and Vitamin D before the Fall/Winder doldrums set in. I have been sitting out in the sun and reading a book on natural health remedies and taking notes. I have been having trouble getting up in the mornings...why, I do not know. I don't want to face the world. I feel uncertain about my life. I feel aimless and purposeless. I feel that I do not matter, when I know I do. I am reading so much about mental illness. I feel that my medication is not doing its job anymore, or its effect is lessening.
I have to give a talk on addictions tonight. No, I am not nervous about that. I guess I just need someone to talk to about this. There are not many people who are open and authentic about their feelings, and I just do not enjoy trying to converse with them. I try to stay busy, to be of service to someone, even if it is my significant other. He is my best friend, I guess. I can talk to him up to a point.
I'm rambling, I know. But if I sign off from here, I feel as if I will disappear ! Isn't that silly? Does anyone else feel like that sometimes. Signing off, Perplexed

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